At some point it seemed I had written all I could think of in terms of relationships. Maybe I just became bored writing about the problems I saw in those relationships. I wanted to apply it to film, or to the scenes I use to write in classes, with my new understanding of human nature. I wanted a challenge and to see how deeply I could affect someone with what I wrote. I believe it was the famous actress Uta Hagen who once said that it was easy to get applause as an artist. To actually touch or connect with someone when performing in a way that you can bring tears to their eyes was a whole different challenge. When you do, that’s when you know you’re doing something right.
Writing of course has the same challenges. In my eyes it’s what separates a good writer from a great one. It’s what I hope I am, or at least what I hope to be. I wanted to do it differently though. Most of the scenes I had written for acting classes were sad. I asked myself what would be another indicator of affecting people emotionally. At the same time, what would be a challenge to write? I wanted to do something I’ve never done before.
I thought it’d be interesting to write a short erotic story. I can’t remember exactly why that came to mind. Maybe it was through some of the relationship discussions I had had with women that wandered lightly into that territory, and a few of them mentioning having read such stories that they enjoyed. To have an effect on someone in that way, through words alone I thought would be quite a feat. It was also something I hadn’t attempted before. It would be a challenge to write something for women that was erotic and yet not vulgar or offensive. The idea intrigued me as it’s such a difficult balance to find with women as a male.
Several days later I had completed the story. I hesitantly posted it on a blog. I can still remember cringing as I uploaded and saved it. I was afraid of looking like a deviant in some of my readers eyes even though it wasn’t as graphically descriptive, or pushing the limits, as some other writers do in their books. I can’t begin to explain how hard it is to think of non-vulgar sounding words that describe human anatomy in a way that’s attractive. Although, my wording was likely tame by todays standards with bestselling books like 50 Shades of Grey.
Even though it was only a few pages long, I actually received a few great comments on it. I also received a few emails that told me the effect I was wondering if I could create through words had actually done just that. Surprisingly, there was no hate mail or mention of being a deviant to my relief. I sometimes wonder if I had started writing it at this point in time with 50 Shades of Grey being so popular, if I would have had the same cringing worries or carefulness in wording the story. It’s odd how the openness and acceptance of society to such writings changes so quickly over time. Like acting, I would encourage any writer to write about what makes them uncomfortable. It opens so many doors in becoming comfortable in one’s own skin and realizing that society isn’t always as harsh as we think it is. With that comfortableness comes confidence and awareness which is one of the most valuable assets to any artist. Between that and the positive responses, I began thinking more about the possibilities of actually writing a longer story.
Continue to Part 3 of The Bewitching – How it started